"No Regrets"
Am I the only that gets extremely annoyed whenever anyone says "I have no regrets" or "If I could do it all over again, I wouldn't change anything" or anything alone those lines?
Let me make this clear: I have a lot of regrets, and if I could do it all over again, I would change many things. That's not because I'm living in the past, it's because I'm living on Earth.
Aside from the blatant dishonesty inherent to claiming to have no regrets, the other thing that bothers me about it is that a person with no regrets is probably a complete asshole. For instance:
Joe: "You know Bob, I really didn't appreciate it when you fucked my girlfriend."
Bob: "Meh, I have no regrets."
Obviously most of us haven't fucked someone else's girlfriend, but we've all done things that we should regret, not just for our sake, but for everyone else's.
Next time someone tells me they have no regrets, I want to punch them in the face and then ask, "Oh really, do you regret saying that?"
Let me make this clear: I have a lot of regrets, and if I could do it all over again, I would change many things. That's not because I'm living in the past, it's because I'm living on Earth.
Aside from the blatant dishonesty inherent to claiming to have no regrets, the other thing that bothers me about it is that a person with no regrets is probably a complete asshole. For instance:
Joe: "You know Bob, I really didn't appreciate it when you fucked my girlfriend."
Bob: "Meh, I have no regrets."
Obviously most of us haven't fucked someone else's girlfriend, but we've all done things that we should regret, not just for our sake, but for everyone else's.
Next time someone tells me they have no regrets, I want to punch them in the face and then ask, "Oh really, do you regret saying that?"
posted by Larry R. Friedman at 10:08 PM
3 Comments:
But at the same time, if i had made different choices in middle school, high school and whatever...perhaps i would have grown up differently and became a different person. And if you are happy with who you are now, why change anything in the past?
For sake of argument, i could have started drinking alcohol in the eighth grade and been cool like everyone else. But would that have made me happier than i am now?
I agree that most people have regrets. I have a lot. I don't know if i would change them though, given the chance.
i agree with megan: you know: uncertainty principle, 20/20 hindsight, and all of that. you've got to keep these things in mind.
that said, people are wrong to act as if regret is impossible. of course, everyone's going to have regrets at some point or another. when people toss out 'i have no regrets' - especially when it's more careless, i think they really mean, 'i have no trivial regrets.' is this a carte blanche for AssHole-ism? yeah, maybe.
but for the most part i think the 'no regrets' thing is a good sentiment. how many people our age are drowned in uncertainty, overanalysis, etc.? these are some of the pillars of geekdom... that is, being young and intelligent at the same time. for the most part, these people tend to be much more regretful, or critical than they need to be.
before this gets too long, i'll go ahead and come to a point..
you can regret everything if you really want to. you can displace yourself entirely with could-have and would-have, or not at all. there is a balancing act here that can't be simplified with whether or not you have regrets or not, whether you think you've lived a Good Life, or a Bad Life, whether you're going uphill, downhill, or on a sine wave, or however it is you want to paint it. i don't think this is a reason to want to physically hurt someone.
(we'll have to have a few drinks again sometime soon so i can explain to you my no-regret universal-danceparty theory and see if you punch me for it.)
also
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